Of all the most sinful, debauched and disgusting things I have done with bacon, this one takes the cake.

On a depravity scale of 1 to 10, these are a 11.25, at least.

Chocolate dipped marshmallows rolled in toffee and bacon? I need an intervention.

Send a Rabbi please. Make sure he brings some M&Ms, though – in case my blood sugar gets low.

If you’re a boy, or more specifically my husband, you’ll scowl in repulsion at these chocolate, bacon, and toffee covered marshmallows. But if you’re a little wacky like me, you’ll love these and devour their sticky, melty chewiness while gnawing the stick clean.

In fact, if you’re like me, you order a diet soda with your extra-value meal.

Oh yeah, that’s right, I get down with the Mickey D’s.

If you’re anything like me, sometimes you go to bed without washing your makeup off, only to wake up with eyelashes smearked (thats smeared and caked ) into one large mascara’d mess.

And let’s get real, y’all – it’s got to be a pretty special occasion (i.e. a cold day in Hell) for you to get dressing on the side. I know. In fact, while we’re at that table, maybe you DON’T always keep your elbows off it. How else are you going to participate in totally inappropriate dining conversation if you can’t lean in, waving your fork for emphasis?

And when you finally get to a point when your pants won’t zipper, you diet. Because for you, “eating intuitively” is a joke. You intuitively like the feeling of a full belly, so you have something to rub when you sigh after a good meal. Your intuition isn’t a naturally skinny girl – she’s a mouthy bitch that loves cake.

So, if we have a little or a lot in common, you should try these stone cold, trashy-ass marshmallows and enjoy them with as little shame as I did.

Just make sure to get a Diet Coke on the side.

Chocolate Toffee and Bacon Covered Marshmallows

Marshmallows
Chocolate chips (milks chocolate or semi-sweet)
Heath bar toffee bits
Bacon, finely diced and fried until crisp
Lollipop sticks

Line a plate or a cookie sheet with wax paper. Insert a lollipop stick into one flat end of the marshmallows and set aside.

Melt the chocolate chips over a double boiler. Dip the marshmallows into the melted chocolate and gently shake to dislodge excess chocolate. Roll one half of the chocolate dipped marshmallows in toffee and the other half in the bacon. Set the marshmallows on the plate or cookie sheet and allow the chocolate to cool and harden completely before eating.